The Picture of Others in Our Mind
In the graphic novel Maus by Art Spiegelman, he talks about how he often felt compared to the idea of his older brother Richieu, who died as a child during World War 2. Richieu was later idealized in his parent’s mind. What would he have become? Surely not a “useless artist” like his younger brother, Art.
A person’s ghost lingers long after they have gone. They might be gone from this world or just gone from our lives. Either way, their memory is what remains and they cannot add or take away from this anymore. The only thing that will contribute to the evolution of their legacy are new memories; memories of them from others that you didn’t previously know, memories that others create on their behalf, etc. But the person who is gone gets no active choice in this. This leaves a lot of room for imagination and wondering “what if?”
An Idealized Ghost
I think a common comparison can come from a lost love.
In the book, Art’s father often compared his current wife to his late wife. He spoke very differently about them. He spoke longingly of his late wife, while he would mumble and grumble about day-to-day grievances regarding his present wife. Both his current wife and son were competing with ghosts.
But imagination isn’t real, it tends to be an idealization. You get to decide on the version that you wish for. But wish and hope are different from reality. Maybe Richieu would have become a success, maybe he would’ve moved abroad, maybe he would have struggled with addiction, there is no way of knowing. Their legacy becomes a “choose your own adventure” story.
Romance Scams & Imaginary People
Today, the “idea” of people will show up in different ways, not just the memories that we are left with of actual humans. There will be the idea of artificial “humans” as well, such as AI companions.
People will now have to compete with AI identities for relationships and entertainment. Depending on their relationship to the user, AI companions can fill a role of romantic partner, friend, confidant, therapist, etc. It is hard for a human to compete with this. But still, the companion is an abstract, idealized friend. The user gets to design and use it how they want.
Romance scams can be similar to this. This can happen in one of two ways.
Method one is that the scammer takes the identity of a celebrity and cultivates a scenario where the celebrity “falls in love” with a fan and asks for donations over the internet.
Method two is that scammers use a person with a lot of public images but who is not recognizable to most people. The scammer creates a new identity of this person: new name, geographic location, career, etc. They retain some details of the original person (only when the details benefit the ruse). But everything else can be made up. Now this new “person” is nothing like the original, except in small ways. They are an “idea” of a person since they don’t actually exist. They exist only in the mind of those involved in the scam. Just as Richieu now exists only in the minds of the people who remember him.
The Dangers of Living in Imagination
Living in a state where the only boundaries are your imagination is probably a dangerous place to live mentally. And this can get taken advantage of in the modern world.
Art frequently references in Maus what it was like to grow up with that. All people will not share the same perception of the memory. Not everyone will participate in the imagination, although the chosen imaginary version of the figure is comforting to the person holding it.
Messy Bun Book Lover
(Originally posted on June 3, 2025)
Read Maus by Art Spiegelman → https://amzn.to/3JehSXw
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