Giving Yourself the Space to Ask Questions
Lately I have been thinking a lot about the benefits that this blog has been having on my life. I have talked about how I feel lighter and happier for having a place to share my authentic thoughts. I began to wonder why this is. I know honesty is healthy. But why am I feeling such a difference between how I feel writing this blog vs. in my everyday life?
I think I might have found one reason: questions and answers.
In a person’s day-to-day life, they are expected to have an answer for everything. Your boss asks you for details on last quarter’s performance? You better have it ready. Your kid asks you where their missing sock is? Well, they are late for school so you better find it. In school you are expected to know the right answer. Answers. Answers. Answers. But in my life, I stopped allowing myself the space to ask questions.
I have a lot of questions about the world today. It is a confusing time to be alive. Sure, I went the traditional route and got a good education but I can still admit that there are a lot of things that I do not know.
Can You Ask Questions or Do You Always Need to Provide the Right Answer?
I think work and school have become places where you can’t easily question things. You have to provide the right answer. But what if I want to provide the right answer to a different question? Is there space for that?
With this blog, I don’t feel the need to provide an answer to anyone. I am writing about my year-long journey of self-improvement. The person most impacted by the success or failure of these efforts will be me… and maybe the people around me. But the epicenter of the successes or failures will be me. As they say, you take yourself with you wherever you go.
I like the fact that, with this blog, my mind can wander. I can end posts in a question. I am not expected to immediately have the right answer.
In fact, with topics like self-improvement, rarely can answers be demanded of yourself immediately. Progress is slow, thoughtful, and iterative.
I have fallen out-of-step with this way of thinking. But now, I can feel my mind dilating in a structure like this. I am able to voice out loud the quiet thoughts, the ones that have been pulling on my mind for years but that I never gave myself much time to think about because I didn’t have an immediate answer to them.
Messy Bun Book Lover
(Originally posted on Apr. 26, 2025)