Good & Bad Themes During My Book Reading Challenge
Throughout my year-long Reading Challenge, I have intentionally selected books that span a wide range of topics, voices, and experiences. And many positive themes keep appearing- like the importance of self-expression and community.
But some disheartening patterns have surfaced too, such as the prevalence of sexual abuse. I didn’t keep a tally of how many books mentioned it, but the volume and pace of my reading made the topic hard to miss.
Sometimes it presents itself subtly within the pages, other times it smacks you in the face outright.
Either way, it breaks your heart every time you come across it.
It was my latest book that finally made me recognize the pattern and pen this post.
Quiet Abuse From An Unlikely Perpetrator
In I’m Glad My Mom Died, author Jennette McCurdy talks about how her mother showered her and gave her breast and vaginal exams until she was 17.
Any of Jennette’s attempts to stop these encounters were met with her mother’s emotional manipulation and insistence that it was “necessary”.
Recurring Patterns
Although the above example may seem like an atypical case of sexual abuse, I fear it is more common than we as a society would like to admit. And it retains many characteristics often found in sexual harm:
- victim confusion and discomfort
- a power imbalance
- trust between victim and perpetrator
- emotional conditioning
- shame
- behaviour being an “open secret” affecting others
- multiple victims (in this case Jennette’s brother)
- consequences for not complying
- pressure on the victim to protect the perpetrator
The harm does not always look the same, but these general consistencies reveal themselves.
People Being Given the Space to Speak
Everyone deserves boundaries, safety, and to be surrounded by people who respect both. When those basic needs aren’t met, the effects can be devastating and can last a lifetime.
I’m grateful that we’re living in a moment where people are increasingly given the space, language, and support to speak about these experiences openly. Even though we as a society have a long way to go in acknowledging and preventing it.
It is my hope that if I do another Reading Challenge in the future, I will not come across this topic so much. Not because people aren’t given the space to talk about it, but because it doesn’t occur in the first place.
Messy Bun Book Lover